Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Mirror, Mirror...

The start for this post has been sitting in my drafts for weeks... I keep meaning to get to it, but keep finding other things that I need to do.  Between work, being a mom/wife, and an online class that I am taking this term I have so little time to myself... oh... and also trying to get some exercise.

I want to talk a little bit about body image. The idea of "body image" seems to be all over the place right now. Between the super-fit mom, Dove's 10-year "Real Beauty" campaign, all of this stuff about Lena Dunham and Gabourey Sidibe, the Aerie "Real You" ad campaign... the list goes on and on.  Or, maybe it's not all over any more than normal... but I just started following the Huffington Post and I see it everywhere.  =)

I have always had struggles with my weight and have never really felt physically attractive (because, really, that's what it comes down to when you're young).  I wish that I could have a heart to heart with that 16 year old me who was gorgeous (I look back at photos now and realize how cute I was. lol).

I came to a realization and made a decision about a month ago... and the two may seem somewhat contradictory.  I realized that I was comfortable in my own skin.  I was not as fit/thin as I would have liked to be, but I wasn't unhappy.  My body has done some pretty remarkable things, and I was a healthy, smart, caring, awesome wife/mother/daughter/woman.  I am a good person.

At roughly the same time that I came to this realization, I decided to lose weight.  See?  Seems contradictory doesn't it?  But, here's the thing, I didn't make the decision because I wanted to wear a different size or look good in a swim suit, I made the decision because I wanted to challenge myself to get down to pre-pregnancy weight before having another kid... and then see if I could make healthier decisions with my second pregnancy.  (I have lost all of the "baby" weight from my last pregnancy... it's the "brownie" and "milkshake" weight that is still sticking around).  I'm not doing it for image, I'm doing it for physical health and to reach a physical goal.  I've reach several academic/life goals over the years, but the physical aspect of my life has always been lacking.  P.S.  Just because you're tall, doesn't mean that you are any good at basketball/volleyball!  =)

Right around the same time eMeals came out with a low-calorie meal plan, and I started going to the gym a couple of times a week and started (for the 3rd time) a Couch to 5k workout (ideally I would like to be able to run a 5k this spring--I was never a runner in school and would love to be able to say that I can do it!).  I have always had success when coupling low-cal options and food journaling with cardio.

Like I said, I started this whole thing about a month ago (it was NOT a New Year's Resolution... I started right after Christmas.  Resolutions never work).  So far I have lost somewhere between 10-15 lbs. (and can fit into most of my pre-prego pants!  Score!).  The other day I decided to plug my height/weight into a BMI calculator and see where I stand... and I was pretty damn shocked to say the least.

According to the powers-that-be via the BMI, I am obese.

Now, I know that I have a little extra padding and some junk in my trunk.  But "obese" is NEVER a word that I would have used to describe myself.  Contestants on The Biggest Loser maybe, but it was not a word that I associated with myself.  I am a tall woman.  I carry weight differently.  And, honestly, I was really, really taken aback by this label.

If I would have gotten this "news" as a 16 year old girl, I probably would have cried for days and felt just rotten about myself.  Is this really the message that we want to send?  That just because you hit at a certain point on a chart that there is something to be ashamed of/concerned about?  What about the fact that I don't smoke, have never used any "substances", drink only occasionally, and have never had any issues with blood pressure or anything else concerning to my doctors?  Except for a little roundness, I am a healthy person.

But, apparently, an obese healthy person.

Something needs to change in the way that we express "health" from a weight/body mass point of view.  Heart disease is still the leading cause of death in women (the cause of which has several other factors unrelated to weight... such as family history and smoking), however cancer is trailing behind by less than 2% according to the CDC... and that bitch of a disease doesn't care about a few extra pounds. 

We need to start defining "health" differently.  For the sake of ourselves and those coming after us.

OK... now I just feel like I'm rambling.  I hope that I got my point across... but, at least I got my thoughts out... finally.  =)

21 Months!

(Almost a week late... I need to get better at this. lol)

Weight/Length- Yup... still going to hold off on this as I can never remember to weigh/measure you.  You're tall enough to pull things off the kitchen counter... so, yeah, we're in trouble.  =)

Eating- You love food.  You eat frequently.  Camden's mom at day care says that you are eating every time she's there! lol  You used to really like these breakfast bar things, but then you got a stomach bug and they came back up... and after that you weren't interested any more. lol

Teeth- Same as last month.  No sign of those 2-year molars yet.

Sleep- Sleeping like a champ.  Bed at 8, wake up between 7-8 and down for one nap of anywhere from 1-3 hours (most likely 60-90 minutes).

 Clothes-Same as last month.  Slowly starting to take out the 18 month size from your wardrobe as I realize that the pants are now capris and the shirts show off your belly.  =)

Personality- You are a giant sweet heart.  You say "thank you" frequently (even when it's not really an appropriate time for it. lol) and you like to say "goodbye" to everyone/everything and given kisses.  Every now and then you'll come up to me and say "hug" and then go about playing after you get a little lovin'.  =)  You are definitely a momma's girl right now.  After Christmas your daddy and I switched up the bedtime routine so that now he reads you stories and I put your pajamas on.  We did this so that you could get some cuddly time with dad... as you only seem to want mom right now.  We wanted to make sure that you could also see Dad as someone to provide comfort.

You are also getting a lot better at leaving day care.  You used to not be much of a happy camper when it was time to go, but now you get your own shoes and socks on and are saying goodbye to everyone before I can even manage to get your coat on... the you open the door and start walking out to the car as I'm trying to grab your diaper bag and rush out with you!  =)

  • In addition to Elmo, you are now a big Curious George fan.  You'll say "George" and lead us tot he TV after dinner. lol
  • You like doing your puzzles and playing with your legos.
  • You like working with playdoh and flubber.
  • You like getting piggy back rides... especially if mom or dad is moving really quickly.  =)
  • You like looking at photos around the house and pointing out different people:
  •  You dislike sharing your toys.  You have learned the word "mine".  I'm not a big fan of that one.
  • You dislike not having mom's attention all to yourself.  It's getting more and more challenging to cook with one hand.
  • You dislike riding in a shopping cart.  I worry that this may be a direct link to the "baby wearing" that your dad and I did with you... now you just want to be carried everywhere.  (Or, in the case of the shopping cart, push it or climb on to the front and hang off of it as we go up and down the aisles).
  • You threw up for the first time... and second... and third.  Ick!
  • You started art "classes".  Really just a free-for-all 30 minutes of art fun.  =)
  • Your vocabulary is constantly expanding.  And you are getting really good and repeating back words that we say (we have to start being careful, now!)
  • You're tall enough/stable enough now that you can play in the shallow end of the pool at the community center without mom/dad having to hover over you.  You like to sit in the water and/or jump from standing to sitting and splash everywhere.  And you love to go down the slides!  =) 
  • You said "grandma" and "GG" (great grandma) for the first time... and in their presence!  =)

Tuesday, January 21, 2014


My daughter is a 14 year old trapped in an almost 2 year old body. Case and point:
Normal wake-up time is around 7. This morning Emily woke up at 6:30. I was in the shower and Jacob was still in bed. Jacob invited her up to cuddle/play on the big bed, but she just screamed at the bathroom door (she wanted in/to see me). Here's what happened next...

Jacob: You have two choices, you can either come play on the bed with me, or you can go back to your room.

Emily: Room. *grabbed her blanket, returned to her room, closed the door, turned off the light, and crawled back into bed*.

By the time I got out of the bathroom, she was already back to sleep. Lol

Little Miss 'Tude at Day Care. lol